Note: This sermon was preached by Pastor Thomas with Crestview on December 6, 2020.
BACKGROUND:
· There was a problem with the leadership of the church in Ephesus that needed to be corrected. Unqualified leadership was allowing the church to drift into false doctrine. Women may not teach or exercise authority over men in the church – so who can? Who is qualified?
· Overseers of the Church: 3:1-7
READ 1 Timothy 3:8-15
Outline:
· Behave as God’s household (vss. 14-15)
· What is a deacon? (vs. 8)
· Deacon qualifications (vss. 8-12)
· Wives or women deacons? (vs. 11)
· The rewards for those who serve well (vs. 13)
Behave as God’s household (vss. 14-15)
14 I hope to come to you soon, but I am writing these things to you so that,
15 if I delay, you may know how one ought to behave in the household of God, which is the church of the living God, a pillar and buttress of the truth
The purpose of this letter is to give Timothy guidance about how believers should live as the church.
Household of God: Family
Truth: Revealed by God, Proclaimed by teachers. Believed by members. Behaviors practiced.
The truth of sound doctrine must be carried out in the conduct of the church family. Very practical:
· Godly Elders who lead & teach = qualified
· Godly Deacons who serve = qualified
· Holy behavior & uncontentious prayer
· Modest dress
· Biblical church order
Chapter 1: This truth and corresponding behavior was under attach by false doctrine being promoted in Ephesus. Timothy is there to bring correction.
Chapters 4-6: This theme of behaving properly will continue.
Today: One of these practical ways that truth must be carried out is that the church should be able to recognize godly, qualified deacons.
What is a deacon? (vs. 8)
8 Deacons likewise must be dignified,
Just as he did in verse 1 with overseers, Paul does not explain in this passage what a deacon is. He assumes that Timothy and the church at Ephesus have a good understanding of what a deacon is, but I don’t want to make that assumption for us today. So, I want to begin by explaining what a deacon is in the Bible.
There are two recognized offices in a New Testament church:
· Overseers/Elders/Pastors: A team of spiritually mature men, recognized by the church, who shepherd the Lord’s church by teaching God’s word and providing spiritual leadership.
· Deacons: Deacons are the servant-ministers who give attention to caring for the congregation’s physical welfare and preserving the unity of the church. They are to assist & relieve the elders of the multitude of practical duties of caring for the flock - freeing them up to oversee, teach, and pray.
Deacon: is a transliteration of the GK, diakonos means a servant, helper, or minister. Most often in the NT the word means someone who performs a service or ministry – not to a recognized church office. For Example:
Rom 15:8 For I tell you that Christ became a servant to the circumcised to show God's truthfulness, in order to confirm the promises given to the patriarchs
1Co 3:5 What then is Apollos? What is Paul? Servants through whom you believed, as the Lord assigned to each.
A few times, the word is used to refer to the official recognized position in the church:
Phi 1:1 Paul and Timothy, servants (dulos/slaves) of Christ Jesus, To all the saints in Christ Jesus who are at Philippi, with the overseers and deacons
This is the way the word is being used here in 1 Timothy 3. But what is this office and how is it different than overseers/pastors. The answer we find in Acts 6:
Act 6:1-7 Now in these days when the disciples were increasing in number, a complaint by the Hellenists arose against the Hebrews because their widows were being neglected in the daily distribution. 2 And the twelve summoned the full number of the disciples and said, "It is not right that we should give up preaching the word of God to serve tables. 3 Therefore, brothers, pick out from among you seven men of good repute, full of the Spirit and of wisdom, whom we will appoint to this duty. 4 But we will devote ourselves to prayer and to the ministry of the word." 5 And what they said pleased the whole gathering, and they chose Stephen, a man full of faith and of the Holy Spirit, and Philip, and Prochorus, and Nicanor, and Timon, and Parmenas, and Nicolaus, a proselyte of Antioch. 6 These they set before the apostles, and they prayed and laid their hands on them. 7 And the word of God continued to increase, and the number of the disciples multiplied greatly in Jerusalem, and a great many of the priests became obedient to the faith.
This arrangement of roles between the apostles and the 7 appears to be the germination of the elder/deacon roles that would be employed in churches. Notice what was going on:
· Growth created new challenges: apostles were overwhelmed with work
· Conflict: widows, age & ethnicity & language
· Solution: Division of responsibilities: Apostles: Ministry of the Word. Seven: taking care of the widows and solving conflict. They were to look after those easily overlooked.
· Qualifications: good reputations, wise, and full of the Spirt
· Nominations: by the church, affirmed by the apostles.
· Result: Word spread, disciples increased!
Conclusion: Deacons are the servant-ministers who give attention to caring for the congregation’s physical welfare and preserving the unity of the church. They are to assist & relieve the elders of the multitude of practical duties of caring for the flock - freeing them up to oversee, teach, and pray.
Apply:
What a blessing good, faithful, proactive deacons are to the ministry of the church!
Ministry description: Open ended
Question: What needs to be done? Where are elders being overwhelmed? What can you take off their plate?
Kinds of responsibilities deacons typically serve:
· Caring for members in need, widows, orphans.
· Benevolence fund and ministry.
· Caring for the sick and families who have had loved ones pass away.
· Any practical needs that might arise: handicap ramps, cut grass, house repairs.
· Oversight and maintenance of the church building and grounds.
· Lords Supper & Baptism
· Hospitality
· Finances
· “Other duties as they arise”
ASSURANCE: While any believer can do most of these tasks, the church identifies qualified deacons to make sure these things are done. Deacons are there to help make sure no one falls through the cracks.
· Church: Communication is necessary. If you need help, feel overlooked – contact your deacon or any elder.
Trans: The membership of the church must be able to recognize and appoint members to this important role. This leads us now to the qualifications…WHO should serve as deacons?
One of the first qualifications is this: Is this a gender specific role?
Wives or women deacons? (vs. 11)
We have already seen in chapters 2 & 3 that both the role and function of overseer/elder/pastor is limited to spiritually mature men who meet the Biblical qualifications:
1Ti 2:12 I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man;
Since overseers are responsible for preaching, teaching, leading, overseeing the church – we must conclude this is a gender specific role. Women have many ways to serve in the local church – even using gifts of teaching and leadership – I addressed this a few weeks back.
But what about the role of deacon? May women serve in this role?
11 Their wives likewise must be dignified:
Wives: Gk: Guna, means “female/ woman” and sometimes is translated “wife”. How it is translated is determined by the surrounding context.
The case for women or deaconesses:
· 1) Since the role of deacons is to be servants within the church – they are quite different than overseers. If deacons are not teaching and exercising authority over men in the church – why would women not be welcomed into this role?
· 2) Why would Paul give requirements for the wives of deacons, but not for the wives of overseers?
· 3) In vss. 8-13 there seems to be a progression: Qualifications for all deacons generally (8-10), Qualifications focused on female deacons (11), then Qualifications specific to male deacons (12-13).
· 4) There is evidence of a female deacon in Romans 16:1, Phoebe:
Rom 16:1-2 I commend to you our sister Phoebe, a servant of the church at Cenchreae 2 that you may welcome her in the Lord in a way worthy of the saints, and help her in whatever she may need from you, for she has been a patron of many and of myself as well.
· Paul specifies her service by linking it to a specific local church: a servant of the church at Cenchreae. We know she was a servant and patron to MANY beyond her local church, so Paul could have just said she was a servant, but he doesn’t do that. He refers to a specific role she has with her home church – which fits the office of deacon.
The case for wives of deacons:
· 1) The structure of vss. 8-13 does not show a progression, it shows a clarification. The whole section is dealing with male deacons, like a sandwich, in the middle (vs. 11) is a requirement for his wife to be qualified – it is not addressing women generally, but the woman united to that man.
· 2) Even though deacons are different than overseers, they DO carry a form of servant leadership authority in the church – sometimes a significant degree. For this reason, it is best for men to fill this role and for their wives to be immanently qualified to serve alongside them.
· 3) The reason wives are mentioned, is specifically because of their partnership in the deacon ministry they have with their husband. An overseer’s wife can support his authority and teaching responsibilities – but cannot share them. Where a deacons’ wife should be integrally involved in serving the church and there are many legitimate ways she may do the very ministry alongside him.
Teaching & Authority
· Key question: What do your deacons do? This may vary from church to church.
· SBC History: Do they carry authority over the leadership of the church? For this reason many Baptist churches were right to have male only deacons.
· However, with the growing recovering of plurality of elders, there is a growing freedom in many conservative, Bible-believing, complementarian churches to have women serve in as deacons.
· Are they women taking on servant roles? Deaconesses in church history especially served the needs of women – visiting women, assisting in baptisms, and serving in ways that were specific and appropriate to the needs of women.
Crestview’s history: The role is understood to be wives. Implications:
· When we qualify a man – his wife must also be qualified. As a couple they are in this servant ministry role.
· So….we may not recognize “deaconesses” but we do have Deacon’s wives (and elders wives for that matter. They too must be qualified.
Deacon qualifications (vss. 8-12)
8 Deacons likewise: Paul is turning to a related concern. Just as overseers must be qualified, so too deacons must meet certain moral qualifications and proficiencies in marriage and family life.
· must be dignified (mentioned again in vs. 11 for wives): honorable, worthy of respect, outstanding character.
· not double-tongued: saying different things in different settings, saying one thing and doing another, lack of sincerity, hypocritical, decietful
· not addicted to much wine: If he feels he has the Christian freedom to drink – he stays far away from becoming intoxicated. He never gets drunk. Alcohol is not a master of his life. He is a model of a sober life. Alcohol is not a trip-hazard in his life.
· not greedy for dishonest gain: He is a man of integrity, not allowing money to compromise his character or Biblical convictions. He would not sell his soul, or the ministry of the church, to fill his pockets. One of the ways to see this in a man’s life is that he is a generous giver – faithfully supporting his church & helping those in need.
· 9 They must hold the mystery of the faith with a clear conscience: They must clearly grasp and believe the gospel. They must have a strong knowledge of God’s Word, they must give evidence of true conversion, must understand the sound doctrine enough to live it and model it to others. Every elder must be able to teach, but this is not required for deacons.
· 10 And let them also be tested first; then let them serve as deacons if they prove themselves blameless. Deacons need to have gone through a few battles. How have they faced church conflict? Have they stood strong through some heat? Did they prove themselves blameless – or were they part of the problem. This is one reason we have minimum time requirements before serving (2 years for deacon, 3 for elder).
Illus: Bucket of Gasoline & Water
· 11 Their wives likewise must be dignified: honorable, worthy of respect, outstanding character.
· not slanderers: tearing others down with their words, gossipers, loose lipped.
· but sober-minded: self-controlled, moderate – not prone to excesses.
· faithful in all things: All she does is done in faith. Not just dependable and reliable, but doing things with the right attitude with the proper perspective honoring the Lord and others.
· These last two qualifications I addressed last Sunday because as they are requirements for elders as well. Deacons must have good marriages and homes: (*SEE SUPPLEMENT BELOW FOR THIS INFORMATION)
· 12 Let deacons each be the husband of one wife: (I addressed this last week at length) This qualification means that a man must be above reproach in his marriage and faithfully devoted to his wife. It does not automatically bar single men from consideration, nor men who have been divorce or remarried according to Biblical guidelines.
· managing their children and their own households well: a deacon must be godly, faithful leader in his own home, if he is to lead God’s family – the church. The home is the proving ground for church leadership. He leads and loves his wife and children; he is attentive and engaged in home life. He instructs and disciplines his children.
The rewards for those who serve well (vs. 13)
13 For those who serve well as deacons gain a good standing for themselves and also great confidence in the faith that is in Christ Jesus.
* SUPPLEMENT FROM PREVIOUS WEEKS’ SERMON
The husband of one wife (vs. 2)
These next two overseer qualification address marriage and family life.
The Husband of one wife: What does this mean? (Notice the same qualification appears in vs. 12 for deacons)
Faithful to his wife: Integrity and fidelity in his marriage. He loves his wife and is exclusively faithful to her. An overseer is not a man who flirts with other women nor does he get emotionally or romantically involved with anyone other than his wife. He is lovingly, exclusively, devoted to his wife.
An overseer is to be a model of a godly husband:
Eph 5:25-27 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.
FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS:
May an unmarried man serve as overseer/elder/pastor?
Jesus and Paul were both single. In 1 Corinthians 7, Paul commends singleness as a path of devotion to the Lord for some believers. Based on what we see in Scripture in other places, it does not seem reasonable to conclude that this qualification REQUIRES an overseer to be married.
So, Yes, an unmarried man, who is otherwise qualified, may serve as overseer so long as he is a man of purity and celibacy – above reproach in his friendships and behavior toward women.
Widowers: This same understanding would apply to a man whose wife has died.
Note: this also means that if a man is serving as an overseer (or deacon) and his wife dies – he should not be expected to stop serving because he is now single.
May a man who is in a second marriage serve as an overseer?
The Bible allows and in some circumstances, commends, remarriage. So on the basis of the balance of scripture, we cannot conclude this command means one and only one wife during a lifetime. For Example:
Widowers may remarry: The Bible teaches that a man or woman who’s spouse has passed away, is free to remarry – so long as they marry a believer. Second marriages are not only permitted, but even commended in some circumstances. (1 Tim 5:14, 1 Cor. 7:39-40):
1Ti 5:14 So I would have younger widows marry, bear children, manage their households, and give the adversary no occasion for slander.
So, Yes, a man who is remarried because his first wife died, who is otherwise qualified, may serve as an elder.
Note: Adoniram Judson, missionary to Burma, outlived 2 wives and was married to a 3rd when he died. History is filled with similar examples of faithful, godly elders/pastors who remarried.
Now, I have already shown this is a moral qualification of fidelity to one’s wife. Since widowers may Biblically remarry, the command cannot mean only one wife in a lifetime.
May a man who is remarried after divorce serve as an overseer?
Answer: IT DEPENDS. It depends on the circumstances of the divorce. Divorce should not AUTOMATICALLY disqualify a man because there are a few circumstances in the Bible where divorce is permissible, and not sinful. We do not have the right to condemn what the God in his Word permits.
Examples of sinful divorce: There are many examples of divorce in which a husband and wife have sinfully neglected and harmed one another. Lack of love, repentance, and forgiveness, hardness of heart, immorality….when a man is guilty of such and his marriage breaks up – it does reveal he MAY not be “the husband of one wife” and that he has not “managed his household well”.
Examples of permissible divorce: According to Jesus in the Gospels and the balance of the Word of God – there are situations where divorce is legitimate and permissible – and therefore not sinful:
· Divorce for sexual immorality by a spouse (Matt. 19:9, etc…)
· Divorce for desertion or abandonment of the marriage covenant (1 Cor. 7:15-16). Non-believer leaves. Neglect, abuse, etc…
These are circumstances designed to protect a family from ongoing harm done by a spouse that has sinfully departed from the marriage covenant. In such cases, while hard and difficult, it may be a necessary to protect oneself and children for divorce to be pursued.
In cases where divorce was Biblically permissible, a person is free to remarry in the Lord.
An innocent man, who was victimized by an immoral, likely unbelieving wife, should not be seen to be disqualified from serving as an overseer or deacon, if he is otherwise qualified.
Divorce prior to conversion: Prior to a man’s conversion he may have been guilty of all manner of sinful, depraved living, this could have cost him a marriage. This is the wonder of the Gospel!
1Co 6:9-11 Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, 10 nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.
A man’s life and family situation should not be ignored – but the time of conversion needs to be taken into consideration.
Example: Paul was a murder prior to his conversion – yet was then the apostle of the church! If the grace of God can transform a man guilty of murder, and all kinds of sin – so too we should not automatically see a failed marriage and divorce when a man was not a believer – as AUTOMATIC disqualification.
Remember what the gospel is.
Apply:
· Crestview’s tradition: Divorce has been a litmus test. Men divorced for any reason for any point in their past have not been considered for the offices of deacon or elder. This view is often well intentioned, but it goes too far. The divorce and remarriage instructions in the Bible for believers should not be more restrictive or regulated for overseers (or deacons). While it is a serious error to permit what God forbids – it is also wrong to forbid what God permits. Where God sometimes permits divorce, we are not to forbit it nor disqualify a man to be an elder or deacon, who is otherwise qualified.
· If a man has been divorced – understanding why should be part of the nomination and recommendation process. Men should not be AUTOMATICALLY barred due to divorce without a clear understanding of the situation.
Elder Paper: Marriage, Divorce, Remarriage and Elder/Deacon Qualifications: FORTHCOMING
Conclusion:
This qualification means that a man must be above reproach in his marriage and faithfully devoted to his wife. It does not automatically bar single men from consideration, nor men who have been divorce or remarried according to Biblical guidelines.
Trans: Now let’s look at the third point, another qualification related to the home…
He must manage his own household well (vs. 4-5)
4 He must manage his own household well, with all dignity keeping his children submissive, 5 for if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God's church?
An overseer must be godly, faithful leader in his own home, if he is to lead God’s family – the church. The home is the proving ground for church leadership. In addition being the “husband of one wife” he must be a faithful father.
Manage: means to lead, rule, serve as the head over his family. He is not alone in this leadership, his wife is integrally involved too:
1Ti 5:14-15 14 So I would have younger widows marry, bear children, manage their households, and give the adversary no occasion for slander. 15 For some have already strayed after Satan.
With all dignity keeping his children submissive: He provides loving leadership, discipline, and instruction to his children.
Eph 6:4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
He must not be a rough tyrant with unreachable expectations for his children….he must also not be a pushover who neglects to teach and bring appropriate corrective discipline to his children. He is not to be an absentee father – neglecting his family for work or ministry.
He loves and leads his family – gospel, church, practical life. Even in difficult circumstances and even in times of teenage rebellion – he leads his family faithfully!
His children reciprocate with respect and reverence toward their father. This does not mean that his children are perfect, it doesn’t mean that they will not make serious mistakes, it does not mean they are believers. It does mean they respect their father and recognize he leads their family wisely.
Note: Again, this requirement does not necessarily disqualify single men any more than it requires elders to have MORE THAN ONE CHILD.
Conclusion: Churches should be lead by men who are able to teach and manage their homes well. They have good marriages and they know how to supervise and nurture children. This is in large manner what pastoral ministry looks like.
Apply: I am praying for the Lord to raise up 5-6 men to serve as overseers. We need this. Who are men in the church who you think SHOULD be serving as elders?
· Men who desire to be overseers: focus on your family, not just your doctrine.
· Talk to me if you desire to serve – Discipling group
· Church looking for future elders: Look for men who are faithful husbands and fathers – not just good teachers. If they lead their families well, they can be trusted to lead the church well too.
· Let us as elders know: I think _____ would make a great elder. We listen to you!